Homage to Love and Magic

On December 16, 2021, Dylan and I chose to put our beloved fifteen year old Burmese cat, Drala, to sleep. It was a hard decision, as it always is; even though the doctor made it clear it was the right decision, as his kidney disease had accelerated rapidly to a place of no return. 

Drala was a beloved being, quiet, shy, and easily startled; snuggly, affectionate, and soft. We miss him a great deal.

Drala came to us through friends who had rescued him from a street life in their neighborhood. They fell in love with this delicate and affectionate being, but they also couldn’t keep him. At that point, we had adopted Aviva (who also came to us through the same beloved friends as a rescue cat), and we thought we might need a second cat to keep her company.

Drala and Aviva never did get along all that well, though it is clear now that she misses him. They had a relationship, the nature of which we will never understand as humans, and she has kept close to us, comforting us and letting us comfort her.

Drala’s name is the Tibetan word for “above aggression,” and its meaning is “magic.” It is believed that magic happens above aggression, beyond aggression. In the Shambhala lineage I was first trained in, Drala is a key teaching, reminding us of the ordinary magic of daily life. While magic is important, in other words, it isn’t rare. 

This is what I am sitting with the most after Drala’s death; the magic of his love. He was a deeply loving being, and he accepted our love very easily, especially near the end, where the paths of love and magic were constantly open between him and us.

Those paths of love and magic remain open, in addition to the pain and craving for his living presence that is no longer. Recently, I am getting clearer and clearer that this kind of love is bigger than any of us as individuals. The paths of love and magic aren’t just open to us - we are the paths they take into the world, into us.

So much of what I teach - in photography, in writing, in contemplative psychology - I often refer to as compassion and perception practices. But now, more and more, I want to refer to them as practices of love and magic. Really, I am saying the same thing, but it feels important to not hide these smaller and more potent words behind potentially abstract-seeming concepts.

Here is what I practice, what I teach, what Drala’s spirit reminds me of every moment now: love and magic. These are both best experienced and learned through practice, because we practice distancing ourselves from them; and while solo practice is necessary, we also need community. Whether you find love and magic through the practices I offer or somewhere else, please shore up on them now. Truthfully, we have always needed love and magic, no more now than ever. But now is the only time in which we can practice contacting both love and magic: the now moment, whether it involves depression, grief, joy, or numbness. The now moment is above aggression, isn’t involved in projection into the future or lamenting the past.